Saturday, December 18, 2010

I just need to get this off my chest

I assume by now that everyone out there knows I am pregnant..mostly because I can't seem to stop myself from being all blah blah blah, me me me, bloating, sick, IknowyouhatemebutIcantstoprunningmystupidmouth...
I actually deleted this blog and I think it was just a subconscious desire to attempt to silence myself because I am positive that I am going to annoy and alienate absolutely everyone I know with my new brand of crazy. I really wish I could promise that I will shut the eff up soon and learn to deal but that seems to be the main skill I lack right now. To be completely honest I am terrified and can't stop obsessing about everything and I think I am losing the grip I had on my OCD and I am slowly falling into a scary-ass land of compulsive obsessing and depression and exhaustion and fear. I keep being told that this is all normal and it is hormones but I honestly don't believe that and then I obsess about the fact that I think I am losing my mind..I guess I just want to apologize to everyone for having to put up with me and promise to just shut my damn trap so maybe I can make this feeling that everyone is annoyed by me to go away..
Yeah this totally isn't making me feel better or look any better..
Damn it.

I'm sorry that I don't have a "on a funny note" for this one..
I should probably delete this blog again.